What is the Eternal State of an Infant who Dies?

A Sensitive Subject

 

This is a sensitive question and topic that should not be handled flippantly or lightly.  There are many mothers and fathers and family members who have deep seated emotions which include sadness, anxiety, confusion, fear, and even hope.  In light of this, we need to proceed with love and tact, but we also need to respond with biblical truth.  I spoke on this topic at GBC as we worked our way through the book of 2 Samuel, and we came across David’s loss of his child born to Bathsheba.  After the death of his infant son, he made the statement, “I shall go to him, but he will not return to me” (2 Samuel 12:23).  

 

I wanted to make this material available in written format in the hopes that it may be a source of understanding and comfort for any struggling with this issue.  What follows was largely taken from that sermon and my understanding of God’s Word on this subject.  

 

David’s Child Who Died

 

So, what did David mean by his statement, “I shall go to him, but he will not return to me.”?  Did David believe that his son went to heaven and so they would be reunited there after David died also?  Or was David simply saying,” I will go to my grave also, just like my son.”  In that sense, he would “go to him.”  This leads us to the question, “What happens to a baby who dies?”  Do they go to heaven?  Do they go to be with the Lord?  

 

What Happens to A Baby Who Dies? 

 

Let me give you my quick answer at the outset, before I lay out my reasoning as to why I believe the way I do.  I believe that, “Yes, a baby who dies goes to be with the Lord in paradise.”  Now, why do I believe that is the case? 

 

No Explicit Bible Statement

 

First, it should be stated that the Bible nowhere explicitly states that children who die go to heaven.  Many here will want to simply land sentimentally and believe that babies go to heaven because it would be painful to believe otherwise.  The thought is that God would certainly not refuse a precious little one.  

 

But sentimentalism and feelings are not appropriate tools for establishing truth or determining reality.  Not only that, but we have no right to establish Bible doctrine on the basis of what we HOPE to be true.  We need to draw our answers from what the Bible reveals to be reality and truth.  

 

What About Inherited Sin?

 

One of the sticking points that some might have with my belief on the eternal state of a child who dies, is Bible’s teaching on inherited sin.  That is the truth that all human beings are conceived as sinners.  We have inherited a sin nature from our forefathers, stretching back to Adam’s rebellion in the Garden of Eden.  Romans 5:12 states, “Therefore, just as sin came into the world through one man, and death through sin, and so death spread to all men because all sinned.” 

 

We are born as sinners, having been conceived by other sinners.  Therefore, we have inherited a corrupt or fallen nature.  This sinful nature that we have inherited from Adam ensures the inevitability that we WILL sin.  We do not merely become sinners when we sin, but we sin because we are sinners. 

 

So, what about the infant who dies?  How can I believe that they are ushered into the presence of God, when they have that inherited sin nature also?    

 

We are Judged on the Basis of Our Own Deeds

 

Well, the Bible teaches that we are to be judged on the basis of our deeds committed in the body.  Here are a couple of examples of this truth.  

 

2 Corinthians 5:10 - For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil. 

 

Revelation 20:11-12 - Then I saw a great white throne and him who was seated on it. From his presence earth and sky fled away, and no place was found for them. [12] And I saw the dead, great and small, standing before the throne, and books were opened. Then another book was opened, which is the book of life. And the dead were judged by what was written in the books, according to what they had done. 

 

Adam’s sin and guilt explains our inability to respond to God without being “born again,” BUT the Bible does NOT teach that we will answer for Adam’s sin.  In fact, the very opposite is true.  The Bible teaches that we will answer for our own sin.  Let me give a couple of other passages that I believe highlight this truth.  

 

Romans 1:18 - For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth. 

 

According to this text, God’s wrath is against the ungodliness and unrighteousness of men.  These are those who knowingly suppress the truth about God.  We see the evidence of their knowledge of God in the following verse. 

 

Romans 1:19 - For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. 

 

God has given men the truth, they then suppress the truth in unrighteousness, and the wrath of God is against them for this.  Where there is no awareness of knowledge, there can be no suppression.  

 

In another text of Scripture, Jesus had healed a man who had been born blind.  And the man was taken before the religious leaders to tell them what had taken place.  The pharisees didn’t want anything to do with Jesus, and they rejected the man and his claims.  In response to this, Jesus made this statement…

John 9:39 - Jesus said, “For judgment I came into this world, that those who do not see may see, and those who see may become blind.”

 

He was talking about the pharisees.  They thought that they could see, they believed that they were right with God, but they were actually blind.  Some of the pharisees understood what He was saying and asked him, “Are we blind also?” (v. 40). 

 

John 9:41 - Jesus said to them, “If you were blind, you would have no guilt; but now that you say, ‘We see,’ your guilt remains. 

 

Here’s the point: if we have no way to understand, or “see,” our sin, God does not hold us accountable for it. 

 

We are Accountable for Our Sins, Not Someone Else’s Sins

 

All throughout the Bible, God says that we are accountable for OUR own sins, NOT the sins of someone else.  We see this plainly stated in Ezekiel 18.  

 

Ezekiel 18:19-20 - “Yet you say, ‘Why should not the son suffer for the iniquity of the father?’ When the son has done what is just and right, and has been careful to observe all my statutes, he shall surely live. [20] The soul who sins shall die. The son shall not suffer for the iniquity of the father, nor the father suffer for the iniquity of the son. The righteousness of the righteous shall be upon himself, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon himself. 

 

What we see in Exodus, as well as in 2 Samuel, is that the wrongdoings of parents influence and affect children.  Sometimes children follow the wicked ways of their parents, and sometimes they simply face the terrible circumstances created by their mother and/or their father.  But each person will be held responsible before God for their own actions, not for the actions of someone else.  

 

Barred from Entering the Promised Land

 

We see this principle in action throughout Scripture.  For instance, when all of Israel sinned against God in the wilderness, God barred them from entering the Promised Land.  But he did not bar everyone… 

Deuteronomy 1:39 - And as for your little ones, who you said would become a prey, and your children, who today have no knowledge of good or evil, they shall go in there. And to them I will give it, and they shall possess it. 

 

The Biblical Principle

 

Before people are mature enough to discern right from wrong (maybe we call it an age of accountability), it seems that they are not held responsible before God.  A toddler will sin because he or she bears Adam’s corrupt nature, but they lack the ability to understand the concept of good and evil, and so I believe they are under God’s grace.  They are covered under Christ’s blood, as an act of God’s unmerited favor. 

 

We see the tender care for children in Jesus’ response to His disciples as they sought to shoo them away from Him.

 

Matthew 19:13-14 - Then children were brought to him that he might lay his hands on them and pray. The disciples rebuked the people, [14] but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.”

 

A Widely Held Belief

 

Lastly, let me state that I am not alone in my understanding of the biblical teaching concerning the destiny of children who die.  John Newton wrote to some close friends who had lost a young child.  He wrote, “I hope you are both well reconciled to the death of your child. I cannot be sorry for the death of infants. How many storms do they escape! Nor can I doubt, in my private judgment, that they are included in the eternal election of grace.”

 

Also, Charles Spurgeon, in one of his sermons declared this, “Now, let every mother and father here presently know assuredly that it is well with the child, if God hath taken it away from you in its infant days.  Many of you are parents who have children in heaven. Is it not a desirable thing that you should go there too? Mother, unconverted mother, from the battlements of heaven your child beckons you to Paradise.  Father, ungodly, impenitent father, the little eyes that once looked joyously on you, look down upon you now, and the lips which scarcely learned to call you father, ere they were sealed by the silence of death, may be heard as with a still small voice, saying to you this morning, ‘Father, must we be forever divided by the great gulf which no man can pass?’ Doth not nature itself put a sort of longing in your soul that you may be bound in the bundle of life with your own children?”

 

I hope for some of you that the goodness of God, as revealed in Scripture, grants you great comfort and encouragement as you may be mourning the loss of your own little one.  I firmly believe that they are in the loving arms of our Heavenly Father.  Put your hope and your trust in Him – in His goodness and His grace.  

 

~ Pastor Ryan

Church Member Exit Interview Questions

I've compiled a few open-ended questions to ask members when they are planning to leave our church family.  This is commonly referred to as an "Exit Interview."  Here are the questions that I have thus far...

1. What  would you like to tell the church leadership?  What are the primary considerations that led you to leave GBC? 
2. Are there any unresolved conflicts that you should be working to fix?
3. Are there any ministry areas from which you need to be removed?
4. As you look for a new church home, what will you be looking for?  Have you already determined which church you will join?  What led you to choose them?
5. How can we pray for you and encourage you in your new community moving forward?

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When It's Time to Leave a Church, by H. B. Charles

I detest church hopping. Yet I accept the fact that there are times when Christians transfer church membership. But there is a proper time and way to leave a church.

What are the legitimate reasons for leaving a church? When is the right time to leave a church? How should one leave a church to join another?

Red Lights: Wrong Reasons for Leaving a Church

Here are seven wrongs reasons for leaving a church. 

1.    Sin. Someone has sinned. Maybe it was a leader. Is this a good reason to leave? No. It is not promote holiness to leave because of sin. There was gross sin in the church of Corinth. But Paul commanded the church to deal with the sinning member, not leave the church (1 Corinthians 5:9-13). When Paul bids the saints to “come out from among them,” he was talking about the world, not the church (2 Corinthians 6:14-18). We should respond to sinning brothers with restoration, not amputation (Galatians 6:1-5).

2.    Disagreements over secondary doctrinal issues. Biblical convictions matter. But don’t be willing to die on every hill. Contend earnestly for the faith (Jude). But don’t break fellowship over every disagreement about scripture. Paul advised Timothy, “Remind them of these things, and charge them before God not to quarrel about words, which does no good, but only ruins the hearers. Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth. But avoid irreverent babble, for it will lead people into more and more ungodliness…” (2 Timothy 2:14-16)

3.    Disunity. God hates those who sow discord among brothers (Proverbs 6:16-19). But evidence of salvation is love for your brothers and sisters in Christ (1 John 3:14). And this love is demonstrated by preserving the unity of the spirit in the bond of peace (Eph. 4:1-3). Don’t jump ship because you can’t get along with others. You will only have the same problem at the next church. “Do nothing from selfish ambition of conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourself” (Philippians 2:3).

4.    Personal offenses. There will be times when Christians sin against one another. What then? Leaving is not the answer. Moving every time you are (or feel) wronged will only lead multiple church transitions. Or you will remain at the fringes of the church, which is just as bad. Jesus gives the answer: “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother” (Matthew 18:15). These simple instructions could jumpstart revival in many churches. But what if he doesn’t listen? Turn up the pressure (18:16-20).

5.    Unwillingness to submit to authority. Aaron was more spiritual than Moses. And Joshua was a better leader. But the rod was in Moses’ hand. Don’t fight those the Lord puts in leadership over you. Of course, you should not sit under unbiblical, immoral, or abusive leadership. But there is a way to deal with disqualified leaders (1 Timothy 5:19-20). Without a doubt, you should hold your pastors accountable. But don’t handcuff the spiritual leaders of the church to personal preferences, empty traditions, or unbiblical priorities. Let the leaders lead. And be willing to follow (Hebrews 13:7, 17).

6.    A low view of the church. There is no chapter and verse that commands you to be a church member. But scripture teaches by what it assumes, just as much as it teaches by what is commands. There is no biblical category for an "unchurched Christian."  The apostles would have asked, “Why are you calling her a Christian if he is not a part of the church? Christ is the head of the church. And he does not have out-of-body experiences. You cannot be connected to the head and disconnected from the body. Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5:25-27). And to love Christ is to love what he loves.

7.    Disregard for truth. Paul charged Timothy to preach the word (2 Timothy 4:2). He then warned that faithfulness to the charge would cause some to flee: “For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths” (2 Timothy 4:3-4) Faithful preaching will drive some away from the church. But they will not go home. They will find a church where the preacher will tickle their ears. Don’t let that be you. If you are under sound teaching and faithful preaching, for God’s sake, stay put!

Green Lights: When it’s Time to Leave a Church

Here are three basic and acceptable reasons for leaving a church.

1.    A gospel reason. If the church you are a member of does not believe or teach the biblical gospel, you need to leave. Now. Sinners are saved by grace through faith in Christ, plus or minus nothing. Nothing we do saves us. Salvation is God’s free gift to those who trust in the righteousness of Christ who died for our sins and rose from the dead for our justification. Anyone who teaches any other “gospel” is accursed (Galatians 1:6-9). And any church that embraces a false gospel is not a Christian church. Run for your life!

2.    A doctrinal reason. Here’s the bottom line: You must leave a church when a church requires you to deny what you believe or believe what you deny. You have three responsibilities when it comes to faith: (1) the duty to live by faith (Romans 14:23); (2) the guarding of your conscience against sin (James 4:17); and (3) the command to test all things (1 Thessalonians 5:21-21). Don’t treat doctrinal matters lightly. Truth and peace must be protected. But to ignore truth in the name of people only produces a pseudo-peace.

3.    A personal reason. There are many personal reasons for leaving a church. The most common is relocation. If you have moved to a different city, you need put yourself under the authority of a local church where you live. That was Phoebe’s situation (Romans 16:1-2). Or your church can be so far from your where you live in the city that skipping church becomes a convenient excuse. These and other similar personal reasons are acceptable, sometimes necessary, reasons for leaving a church.

Yellow Lights: How to Leave a Church

How can you leave a local church in a Christ-honoring way? 

1.    Pray. Important decisions should only be made after diligent prayer. Leaving a church is one such decision. Pray about your motives, duty, and relationships. Pray to guard your heart (Proverbs 4:23). Pray for wisdom (James 1:5). Pray for submissiveness to God’s will (Colossians 1:9). Pray quietly. That is, pray about it. Don’t talk about it. Loose talk about your unprocessed thoughts and feelings can sow discord.

2.    Examine your motives. Why do you want to leave? I am not talking about the politically correct reasons you tell others. I’m talking about the true motivations of your heart. Do you even know them? Ask God to search you (Psalms 139:23-24). Then be honest with yourself. And be honest with God. Be careful not to move for the wrong reasons.

3.    Review the commitments you have made to serve. Do you serve in the church? Are you a leader? Will your move disrupt the ministry? Answer these questions prayerfully before you leave. If you have made commitments, do everything within your power to honor them. Put the honor of Christ ahead of yours. Push past unworthy quitting points (1 Corinthians 15:58). You do not want to be found AWOL from an assignment God has given you.

4.    Make sure you have no unresolved interpersonal conflicts. Don’t leave a church because you are mad about something. Don’t leave because someone has offended you. Be ready to forgive and eager for reconciliation. Jesus said, “So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift” (Matthew 5:23-24). Broken fellowship suspends true worship.

5.    Consider how your transfer will affect others. Christianity is not about you. It’s about Christ and others. If your heart is right, you will feel the weight of how your potential move will injure or influence others. If you can leave without affecting anyone, you were not a good member. If your presence matters, consider how your absence will move others. “Let each of you look not only to his own interests,” instructs Paul, “but also to the interests of others” (Philippians 2:4).

6.    Determine where you will transfer your membership before you leave. It’s not the Father’s will for his children to be spiritually homeless. Paul says, “So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God” (Ephesians 2:19). The Lord typically leads to a place, not just away from a place. You should be able to leave a spiritual forwarding address when you leave a church. And you should be able to go to your new church with a recommendation from your old church.

7.    Have an exit-interview with your pastor. It is right for you to talk to your pastor before you leave a church. Is he the reason you want to leave? That is all the more reason why you should schedule a conversation. Hebrews 13:17 says, “Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.”

What do you think? What is the right time to leave a church? What is the right way to leave a church? 

Click Here for original posting

Divorce and Remarriage

The topic of divorce and remarriage is a sticky one, and one that is particularly misunderstood in the church today.  Bible scholars come out with varying views.  I personally am comfortable with the stance taken below from Grace Community Church.  You can click here to see the original.

A GRACE COMMUNITY CHURCH DISTINCTIVE

God Hates Divorce. He hates it because it always involves unfaithfulness to the solemn covenant of marriage that two partners have entered into before Him, and because it brings harmful consequences to those partners and their children (Mal. 2:14-16). Divorce in the Scripture is permitted only because of man’s sin. Since divorce is only a concession to man’s sin and is not part of God’s original plan for marriage, all believers should hate divorce as God does and pursue it only when there is no other recourse. With God’s help a marriage can survive the worst sins.

In Matthew 19:3-9, Christ teaches clearly that divorce is an accommodation to man’s sin that violates God’s original purpose for the intimate unity and permanence of the marriage bond (Gen. 2:24). He taught that God’s law allowed divorce only because of “hardness of heart” (Matt. 19:8). Legal divorce was a concession for the faithful partner due to the sexual sin or abandonment by the sinning partner, so that the faithful partner was no longer bound to the marriage (Matt. 5:32; 19:9; 1 Cor. 7:12-15). Although Jesus did say that divorce is permitted in some situations, we must remember that His primary point in this discourse is to correct the Jews’ idea that they could divorce one another “for any cause at all” (Matt. 19:3), and to show them the gravity of pursuing a sinful divorce. Therefore, the believer should never consider divorce except in specific circumstances (see next section), and even in those circumstances it should only be pursued reluctantly because there is no other recourse.

The Grounds for Divorce
The only New Testament grounds for divorce are sexual sin or desertion by an unbeliever. The first is found in Jesus’ use of the Greek word porneia (Matt. 5:32; 19:9). This is a general term that encompasses sexual sin such as adultery, homosexuality, bestiality, and incest. When one partner violates the unity and intimacy of a marriage by sexual sin—and forsakes his or her covenant obligation—the faithful partner is placed in an extremely difficult situation. After all means are exhausted to bring the sinning partner to repentance, the Bible permits release for the faithful partner through divorce (Matt. 5:32; 1 Cor. 7:15).

The second reason for permitting a divorce is in cases where an unbelieving mate does not desire to live with his or her believing spouse (1 Cor. 7:12-15). Because “God has called us to peace” (v. 15), divorce is allowed and may be preferable in such situations. When an unbeliever desires to leave, trying to keep him or her in the marriage may only create greater tension and conflict. Also, if the unbeliever leaves the marital relationship permanently but is not willing to file for divorce, perhaps because of lifestyle, irresponsibility, or to avoid monetary obligations, then the believer is in an impossible situation of having legal and moral obligations that he or she cannot fulfill. Because “the brother or sister is not under bondage in such cases” (1 Cor. 7:15) and is therefore no longer obligated to remain married, the believer may file for divorce without fearing the displeasure of God.

The Possibility of Remarriage
Remarriage is permitted for the faithful partner only when the divorce was on biblical grounds. In fact, the purpose for a biblical divorce is to make clear that the faithful partner is free to remarry, but only in the Lord (Rom. 7:1-3; 1 Cor. 7:39).

Since divorce is only a concession toman’s sin and is not part of God’soriginal plan for marriage, allbelievers should hate divorceas God does.…

Those who divorce on any other grounds have sinned against God and their partners, and for them to marry another is an act of “adultery” (Mark 10:11-12). This is why Paul says that a believing woman who sinfully divorces should “remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband” (1 Cor. 7:10-11). If she repents from her sin of unbiblical divorce, the true fruits of that repentance would be to seek reconciliation with her former husband (Matt. 5:23-24). The same is true for a man who divorces unbiblically (1 Cor. 7:11). The only time such a person could remarry another is if the former spouse remarries, proves to be an unbeliever, or dies, in which cases reconciliation would no longer be possible.

The Bible also gives a word of caution to anyone who is considering marriage to a divorcee. If the divorce was not on biblical grounds and there is still a responsibility to reconcile, the person who marries the divorcee is considered an adulterer (Mark 10:12).

The Role of the Church
Believers who pursue divorce on unbiblical grounds are subject to church discipline because they openly reject the Word of God. The one who obtains an unbiblical divorce and remarries is guilty of adultery since God did not permit the original divorce (Matt. 5:32; Mark 10:11-12). That person is subject to the steps of church discipline as outlined in Matthew 18:15-17. If a professing Christian violates the marriage covenant and refuses to repent during the process of church discipline, Scripture instructs that he or she should be put out of the church and treated as an unbeliever (v. 17). When the discipline results in such a reclassification of the disobedient spouse as an “outcast” or unbeliever, the faithful partner would be free to divorce according to the provision for divorce as in the case of an unbeliever departing, as stated in 1 Corinthians 7:15. Before such a divorce, however, reasonable time should be allowed for the possibility of the unfaithful spouse returning because of the discipline.

The leadership in the local church should also help single believers who have been divorced to understand their situation biblically, especially in cases where the appropriate application of biblical teaching does not seem clear. For example, the church leadership may at times need to decide whether one or both of the former partners could be legitimately considered “believers” at the time of their past divorce, because this will affect the application of biblical principles to their current situation (1 Cor. 7:17-24). Also, because people often transfer to or from other churches and many of those churches do not practice church discipline, it might be necessary for the leadership to decide whether a member’s estranged or former spouse should currently be considered a Christian or treated as an unbeliever because of continued disobedience. Again, in some cases this would affect the application of the biblical principles (1 Cor. 7:15; 2 Cor. 6:14).

Pre-conversion Divorce
According to 1 Corinthians 7:20-27, there is nothing in salvation that demands a particular social or marital status. The Apostle Paul, therefore, instructs believers to recognize that God providentially allows the circumstances they find themselves in when they come to Christ. If they were called while married, then they are not required to seek a divorce (even though divorce may be permitted on biblical grounds). If they were called while divorced, and cannot be reconciled to their former spouse because that spouse is an unbeliever or is remarried, then they are free to either remain single or be remarried to another believer (1 Cor. 7:39; 2 Cor. 6:14).

Repentance and Forgiveness
In cases where divorce took place on unbiblical grounds and the guilty partner later repents, the grace of God is operative at the point of repentance. A sign of true repentance will be a desire to implement 1 Corinthians 7:10-11, which would involve a willingness to pursue reconciliation with his or her former spouse, if that is possible. If reconciliation is not possible, however, because the former spouse is an unbeliever or is remarried, then the forgiven believer could pursue another relationship under the careful guidance and counsel of church leadership.

In cases where a believer obtained a divorce on unbiblical grounds and remarried, he or she is guilty of the sin of adultery until that sin is confessed (Mark 10:11-12). God does forgive that sin immediately when repentance takes place, and there is nothing in Scripture to indicate anything other than that. From that point on the believer should continue in his or her current marriage.

Family Technology Guidelines

Well here's the final (so far) product.  It really hasn't been tweaked all that much from my previous post.  I say "final (so far)" because this is definitely a work in progress and we will continue to tweak it as the needs arise.  We are around one week into this and it seems to be working well.

Galdamez Technology Guidelines

Technology in our home = Computers, Kindle Fires, cell phones, Nintendo DS, Xbox, iPods, iPod Touch, iPhones, Wii, televisions, DVD movies (and anything else I forgot)

Observations:

·         Technology usage tends to pull you away from healthy interaction with your family and isolate you to your room.  It is easy to waste real life on virtual life.  We need to seek out ways to engage daily in real life and relationships.

·         The use of technology seems to easily become an idol, demanding more and more time and devotion and distracting you from the things of the Lord.  We should each regularly ask the Lord for help in this area.

·         Technology usage is a privilege, not a right.

Guidelines:

·         Up to one hour per day during week days (Monday through Thursday).

·         Up to three hours per day during weekends.

·         In general, technology can be used between 7:30pm and 8:30pm during weekdays, except Wednesdays – between 4 & 5.

·         Allotted time cannot be used until all homework & chores are completed (i.e. dishes done, trash taken out, down stairs picked up, animals fed, clothes put away, rooms cleaned, etc…).  Any chores not completed will be completed during technology time.

·         Use of these technologies (especially cell phones, Kindles, iphones, DS), whether for movie watching, or texting, or video game playing should be done in a family commons areas and not in one’s room in isolation.

·         All passwords to devices and internet sites (Facebook, Instagram, SnapChat, Twitter, etc…) must be known by mom and dad.  Any changes to these must be immediately reported or else consequences will follow.  Parents have the absolute right to monitor any and all technology usage.

·         Technology devices need to be kept in the study on the desk when not being used during allotted times.

·         Time should be spent with God (Bible reading/meditation, prayer) before technology is used.

·         Time on Kindles for reading books is unlimited (but must be used in family areas).

·         Technology should be avoided in the early mornings.

Family Technology Guidelines

This is work in progress.  Shelly and I plan to work out the specifics tonight during our date.  Here's what I have so far...

Galdamez Technology Guidelines

Technology in our home = Computers, Kindle Fires, cell phones, Nintendo DS, Xbox, iPods, iPod Touch, iPhones, Wii, televisions, DVD movies (and anything else I forgot!)

Observations:

·         Technology usage tends to pull you away from healthy interaction with your family and isolate you to your room.

·         The use of technology seems to easily become an idol, demanding more and more time and devotion and distracting you from the things of the Lord.  We should each regularly ask the Lord for help in this area.

·         Technology usage is a privilege, not a right.

·         It is easy to waste real life on virtual life.  We need to seek out ways to engage daily in real life and relationships.

Guidelines:

·         Up to one hour per day during week days (Monday through Thursday).

·         Up to three hours per day during weekends.

·         Use of these technologies (especially cell phones, Kindles, iPhones, DS), whether for movie watching, or texting, or video game playing should be done in a family commons areas and not in one’s room in isolation.

·         All passwords to devices and internet sites (Facebook, Instagram, SnapChat, Twitter, etc…) must be known by mom and dad.  Any changes to these must be immediately reported or else consequences will follow.  Parents have the absolute right to monitor any and all technology usage.

·         Technology devices need to be kept in the study on the desk when not being used during allotted times.

·         Time should be spent with God (Bible reading/meditation, prayer) before technology is used.

·         Time on Kindles for reading books is unlimited.

·         Technology should be avoided in the early mornings.          

Questions to answer:

·         Should there be a time in the evening when the internet is turned off, including weekends?

·         Should there be technology usage times?  Say, between 7-8 pm

·         Should usage be earned by chores, reading, etc? (probably not since they could quickly exceed how much time we would want then on it)

·         Is there a time when all cell phones need to be turned in?

·         What are our tech-free zones?

·         Should there be a technology fast day?

Well, this is what I have so far.  Once I finalize this I'll repost our family guidelines.

For His glory,

Ryan